Therapy for Over-Functioning Moms in Illinois
Support for moms who do it all — and quietly struggle
You’re the one holding everything together. You manage the schedules, the mental load, and everyone’s emotions, but behind the scenes, you’re quietly burning out.
I’m Jolene Altman, LCSW, a licensed psychotherapist offering secure, expert telehealth therapy for moms across Illinois. If you are tired of pretending everything is fine while feeling exhausted, resentful, or disconnected, I am here to help you get your sh*t sorted.
Are you an over-functioning mom?
You might look "high-functioning" to the world, but internally, you feel:
Resentful: Like you’re doing everything for everyone, yet your own needs are invisible.
Overwhelmed: Haunted by an endless mental to-do list that never stops.
Disconnected: Like you’re just "surviving" rather than living your life.
Anxious: Caught in a cycle of perfectionism, “doing more” and people-pleasing to prove your worth.
Stuck: Grappling with a late-diagnosed ADHD brain or mid-life transitions that feel impossible to navigate. (Perimenopause included)
If people think you have your life together but you are quietly falling apart, you are in the right place.
My Approach To Healing (How am I Going to Help You?):
I believe in a relational, trauma-informed approach. I’m not the "nod and smile" therapist; I am an active partner in your growth. My work is rooted in:
Internal Family Systems (IFS) & Somatic Therapy: To help you regulate your nervous system and understand the parts of you that are working overtime.
Relational Therapy & EFT: To navigate the complexities of your family life and connections.
Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT): To help you pivot from obligation to living by your core values.
Direct & Human Guidance: I’m a seasoned, 20-year professional—I’m direct, I’m warm, and yes, I don’t mind if you need to swear to get the point across.
Why Choose Me?
Experienced Support for Real-Life Motherhood
I’m not just a clinician; I’m a married, working mom of two who understands the beautiful, messy chaos of mid-life. * Expertise: I am a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) with a Master’s from Loyola University and a specialized certification in Women’s Mental Health.
The Difference: My clients choose me because I value the relationship. I am unapologetically real, hilariously imperfect, and deeply committed to your growth.
Accessible Care: I offer telehealth across Illinois, bringing therapy into your home so you don’t have to add another commute to your plate.
Who I Work With & How I Protect Your Care
To ensure you get the right support, it’s important to know my focus:
I specialize in: High-functioning moms, mid-life transitions, perimenopause, burnout, and navigating late-diagnosed ADHD.
Note on Scope: I do not provide the specialized acute care required for active, severe suicidality, eating disorders or substance abuse. If this is your current struggle, I will happily connect you with the appropriate resources to get you the specialized, high-level care you deserve.
M E E T J O L E N E A L T M A N , L C S W
I’m Jolene—a married, working mom of two, navigating the beautiful chaos of being a mom in mid-life right alongside you.
I intimately understand the stressors, responsibilities, and self-doubt that can creep in, but I also believe in embracing the joy, peace, and meaning we all deserve. Maybe you are asking yourself, “if I am high functioning, will therapy help me?” The answer is: YES! I know how hard it can be to ask for help—sometimes our struggles feel “stupid” or embarrassing—but I promise you, they’re not. I also understand that sometimes we don’t even know to ask for help until we are suffering. The people pleasing, high achieving, chronically busy mom often quietly struggles with feelings of failure.
Whatever you’re carrying, you don’t have to carry it alone.
W H Y I ’ M
D I F F E R E N T
Many of my clients say therapy gives them a sense of relief— like they can finally put words to their experience, get vulnerable and breathe.
They describe me as warm and approachable, yet I gently challenge them to dig deep and do the work.
We’ll explore the hard stuff together, and through it all, you’ll feel supported and encouraged.
I love laughing with my clients, swapping book and podcast recommendations,
and showing up as my full, authentic self—because I ask you to do the same.
I invest deeply in this work because life is short, and you deserve to feel at peace with yours.
Whether you’re new to therapy or have been before, my clients often say I’m different
because I value the relationship as a vehicle for growth.
I ask you to truly connect with yourself—because when you do,
it’s easier to connect with others and fully participate in your life.
W H O I W O R K W I T H
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New Moms (Pregnancy Through the First Two Years):
Becoming a mom is overwhelming, and we all deserve the space to process the changes and fears that come with it. From not knowing what's happening with your mood and your body to navigating how your relationships shift with your new role, the transition into motherhood is filled with complex experiences. I'll help you identify, understand, and even embrace these complexitites. As a mom myself, I truly understand the need for a safe space to express questions, fears, and even the darkest thoughts. Want to show me pictures of your little one? I love that! Every new aspect of motherhood deserves support, and I’m here to guide you through it.Maybe you're used to having everything figured out, but motherhood is unlike anything you expected. Perhaps you’re struggling to find joy and are feeling low or guilty. It’s okay. Whatever you're feeling, I provide a non-judgmental space to explore it honestly. Sometimes, we don’t even know what we're feeling because we’re so overwhelmed, but we know something doesn’t feel quite right. Together, we can work through that uncertainty and give you tools to make this time more manageable.
Mid-Life Moms:
You want to be the best mom possible, but the demands of modern-day motherhood leave you feeling irritable and resentful. You might catch yourself saying things you never thought you would, or you just can't seem to slow down enough to be the parent you want to be. I specialize in supporting moms because, as a mom myself, I know how challenging it can be.
Throughout the different stages of your child's development, we often respond to situations based on our formative experiences and what’s happening in our bodies and minds. Raising children can stir up feelings from the past that we may not even realize are still affecting us (yes, I’m looking at you, middle school trauma). Whether you’re a new mom or a seasoned one, we all need space to understand who we are within our motherhood journey. Therapy is a dedicated space to unpack how you were raised, how society shapes our expectations of motherhood, and how you feel about being a mom. Let’s dig into the things you have been afraid to say out loud, because we all have them!
I’ll help you process how hormones and mood impact you and work with you to tend to these parts of yourself. Even with the best intentions, motherhood can feel overwhelming, and I understand how high the stakes are when it comes to showing up as the mom you envision. Mid-life motherhood often brings challenges like loneliness, exhaustion, a sense of time slipping away, difficulties in long-term relationships, and dealing with the gap between who you thought your children would be and who they are. If any of this resonates with you, I’m here to help.
Will You Work With Me If I’m Not a Mom Yet?
Absolutely! I also work with women who are contemplating motherhood, trying to conceive, experiencing pregnancy losses, or newly pregnant.
I hold a certificate as a Women’s Mental Health Specialist, with a focus on perinatal loss and Pre-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD).
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It’s becoming a buzzword, but let's face it—women still don’t have enough space to talk about the multitude of symptoms we experience during mid-life and how they affect our daily lives. We deserve to understand, process, and integrate these changes in ways that make sense for us. Together, we’ll work on identifying, naming, and processing the symptoms of this season of life. I’ll help you problem-solve (including navigating who to follow up with and how) and integrate these new changes into your life.
I hold a certificate as a Women’s Mental Health Specialist, with a focus on Perimenopause.
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I know what it is like to be a therapist and feel like it’s impossible to find a therapist for many of the reasons (excuses) we tell ourselves. I know that it feels good to hold everything and help everyone- until it doesn’t.
Many therapists tell me they feel imposter syndrome or struggle to reconcile their own humanity with their role as a therapist. I’m here to remind you that it's okay to be human and show up as a client. I know you know how to do the work, it’s just finding someone you can actually be vulnerable with that can be the harder part.
We know the theory, we know the language, and we’re masters at turning vulnerability into a well-articulated insight. We spend our days holding space, reading between the lines, containing chaos, and reminding people to feel their feelings. But when it comes to ourselves? We over-function like it’s an Olympic sport, and often quietly burn out while saying, “I’m fine, just busy.”
I get it. I really get it. I’m a therapist. I’m a mom.
We hold the invisible. We are so good at pushing down our needs that we end up feeling resentful or irritable. I’ve been there- I know the deep internal conflict we find ourselves in when we don’t have a place to process and share. We are so invested in showing up as “good enough” for our kids and for our clients that we forget to show up for ourselves. It feels like we just keep pushing off our needs until the internal conflict is so loud we can’t turn it off.
My professional and personal experience give me a deep understanding of what it means to be a therapist who’s also a human. I offer a space that’s safe for the parts of you that are raw, real, messy, and unsure. A space where you don’t have to perform, over-explain, or be “on”.
This is therapy for the therapist who don’t want bullshit therapy. I know how imperative it is to feel like you can do everything- the desperation to just not have to slow down. Finding time for your own emotional needs often feels like a luxury you don’t have the space for, but t I also know how important it is to have a place for all the shit we hold. To pause and take a breath. You don’t have to keep it all together here, and you don’t have to keep pretending that you know you need to talk to someone and will “when it works.”
Because I have had excellent therapists help me in times of need, I know how much it can mean to just get it out. I also know how challenging it is to find a therapist who you feel confident in, who you see as someone who can actually help you. Whatever you need, I can handle it. Together, we can figure out what works and what doesn’t.
New Therapists:
If you're new to the field, I’d love to work with you. It’s like professional development and therapy all in one! New therapists are some of my favorite people to work with. I love nurturing insight and helping you make those powerful connections that can lead to growth. Mentoring is one of my all-time favorite aspects of this work. I’ve had amazing mentors along the way, and I want to pay it forward.
New Therapists- Non Clinical Work
How Therapy Helps Over-functioning moms: Come as You Are.
No Pressure. Online Therapy for Moms in Illinois
Is therapy right for you if you are a high functioning mom? Being a mom is a lot. It’s full of joy, but let’s be honest—it’s also overwhelming, messy, and complicated. If you’re feeling the weight of it, you’re not alone.
How therapy helps over-functioning moms: What if you could…
Stop feeling like you’re “not enough” if you don’t say yes to everything
Figure out what you want — instead of what you feel obligated to do
Feel a sense of belonging in the life you’ve created
Slow down without losing the parts of yourself you value
Show up as the parent you envisioned yourself being
Understand patterns of behavior that keep you stuck
Make sense of confusing midlife health changes or a late ADHD diagnosis
Finally put words to the chronic overwhelm you’ve been carrying
Therapy for Moms Who Are Overwhelmed and Exhausted
I help over-functioning moms slow down, feel more connected, and show up more fully in the lives they’ve built. Many of the moms I work with are highly capable, deeply caring, and outwardly “fine” — yet internally running on empty.
Years of over-functioning, people-pleasing, and holding everything together can lead to anxiety, resentment, guilt, and burnout. You may feel like you’re failing at everything, when in reality, you’re simply exhausted.
Being a mom, working, managing a household, and pretending everything is okay takes enormous energy — and it isn’t sustainable.
Talk Therapy for Moms in Illinois
Talk therapy for moms offers space to slow down, make sense of what you’re experiencing, and find more balance and ease. Together, we’ll explore the patterns that keep you stuck in chronic overwhelm and help you learn how to care for yourself while still caring deeply for others.
If guilt, resentment, anxiety, or disconnection take up too much space in your mind, therapy can help you put language to what you’ve been carrying — and begin to feel relief.
I provide online therapy for moms across Illinois, making support accessible even with a full schedule.
A Therapist for Moms Near You — Without the Commute
If you’re searching for a therapist for moms near you, telehealth therapy allows you to receive meaningful, effective care from the comfort of your home. As a licensed psychotherapist in Illinois, I work with moms throughout the state who are navigating burnout, overwhelm, high-functioning anxiety, and identity shifts in motherhood.
You don’t have to be in crisis to seek therapy. You just have to be tired of carrying it alone.
Therapy That Honors Who You Are
I help women cultivate mindfulness, connection, and insight while developing practical tools to bring more peace into daily life. If asking for help feels uncomfortable, I see you. We’ll move at a pace that respects who you are — not who you think you should be….Therapy isn’t about fixing you, it’s about reconnecting with yourself and showing up the way you truly want to in the life you’ve created.
Are you…
Resentful
Lonely
Disconnected
Overwhelmed
Lost
Distracted
Stressed
Anxious
Overextended
Low Mood
Feeling Stuck
Irritable
My clients struggle as you do, despite being capable and caring. You’re taking care of everyone—partners, kids, colleagues, parents, friends—but who’s taking care of you? In therapy, we focus on balance, grounding, and breaking patterns that keep you stuck (hello, people pleasing and chronic overwhelm). This is your time to explore who you are now and what truly matters to you. In therapy, you don’t have to have it all figured out.
You get to show up as you are—messy, exhausted, and real.
Many of my clients feel lonely because they feel disconnected.
The mental load isn’t just a to-do list—it’s an invisible, 24/7 weight that you never get to set down.
Does your life feel like a constant, high-stakes game of logistical Tetris?
The Logistics: Pick up your son at 4:00, juggle a 4:15 appointment, manage a child’s earache, and realize you’re out of soap, tissues, and sanity.
The Hidden Pressure: The dentist needs to be rescheduled, a birthday gift needs to be bought, and a yearbook needs to be ordered.
The Result: You do it all. You handle it all. And yet, it never feels like enough.
The "Loneliness Trap" of High-Functioning Moms
You are capable. You are high-functioning. But beneath that capable exterior, you are likely carrying a deep, quiet pressure to show up perfectly for everyone else.
This state of constant over-functioning often leads to:
Social Withdrawal: You stop meeting friends for coffee—not because you don't want to, but because the mere thought of organizing one more interaction feels impossible.
Emotional Fragility: You find yourself snapping at your family, withdrawing into bed, or feeling a sense of resentment that feels "wrong" to admit out loud.
The "Not Enough" Narrative: You fear that if you drop one ball, everything will collapse. So, you overcompensate, prove your worth through productivity, and keep running on empty.
How Therapy Untangles the Overwhelm
You don’t have to live in a cycle of endurance. Together, we move beyond the "just breathe" advice and get to the core of your patterns.
My goal is to help you:
Identify your triggers: Understand where the fear of "not being enough" actually comes from.
Shift from Endurance to Ease: Learn how to set boundaries without the crushing weight of guilt.
Reconnect with Yourself: Reclaim the parts of your identity that were buried under schedules and responsibilities.
Navigate Mid-Life Transitions: Finally put words to the exhaustion—whether it's linked to perimenopause, late-diagnosed ADHD, or the sheer weight of being a modern mom.
You are likely overly exhausted. It is time to stop carrying it all alone.
Many of my clients often feel like everyone else has it figured out while they struggle to find balance.
This leaves them feeling disoriented and disconnected. They may battle feelings of inadequacy, guilt, or resentment, which can manifest in avoiding family, taking on too much, or having trouble sleeping. Though they are used to being successful and managing many responsibilities, it has become unsustainable. As a result, they judge themselves harshly and fear that if they express these struggles, others will judge them too. This fear can lead to isolation and loneliness, making it difficult to share how they truly feel. My clients often say they feel like they are constantly overwhelmed- whether they do more or they do less, nothing feels quite right. They are quietly struggling and it feels untenable.
I see you, and I want to help you reconnect with the parts of yourself that matter most, so you can align with the things in your life that bring fulfillment.
Together, we will define your core values and align your responsibilities with them, while accepting that no one has it "perfectly figured out." We will work on having tangible skills to navigate your overwhelm.
This is a process—messy and imperfect!
If you are a people pleasing, high functioning mom, it's easy to get lost in the constant cycle of caring for others (especially for women * hello gen-x and millennial women!* who often feel the pressure to be everything to everyone). We forget what it feels like to truly connect with our inner selves in meaningful ways. My goal is to help you rebuild trust in yourself, which is essential for managing life's uncertainties and stressors. If you're scared that you’ll never feel like yourself again or to admit that holding it all is too much, I’m here for you. I understand that uncertainty and fear, and I can help you. Are you ready to learn to navigate motherhood with more balance? Therapy with me is designed to help you find your footing, explore your identity, and equip you with essential tools for a healthier, happier life.
H O W I S H O W U P I N T H E R A P Y
I bring my full, unapologetically real (and sometimes hilariously imperfect) self to every session. That means we’ll laugh, we’ll vent about how aging is a b*tch, and we’ll get your shit sorted—because we all need support and guidance at times. If swearing is part of your emotional processing, go for it. I believe therapy should feel human, relatable, and grounded in real connection.
I show up with compassion, humor, and honesty because that’s what helps us move through the hard stuff. My values—authenticity, connection, growth, and honesty—shape every session. I regularly consult with colleagues, take courses, and attend trainings to ensure I’m always growing as a therapist. Being highly trained, skilled, and intuitive is at the heart of my practice.
I get it—balancing work, family, and the relentless demands of life can be overwhelming. As a mom, I know how hard it is to ever fully switch out of "mom mode"—even when we’re on vacation or doing “self-care.” Self-care that helps us actualize change goes beyond a yoga class or a girls’ trip. It’s about understanding how we store emotions, unpacking the stories we tell ourselves, and learning to truly care for our minds and bodies in a way that creates lasting change.
I work with my clients to explore their emotions, behaviors, and the deeper patterns that shape their lives. We’ll make space for the discomfort that comes with growth while ensuring you feel held, heard, and supported every step of the way.
I hold a Master’s in Social Work from Loyola University (2006) and a BA from Augustana College (2000) and am a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW). Since 2000, I’ve worked in various roles, including supervising and managing therapists. With over two decades in this field, I bring both expertise and lived experience to my practice. I hold a certificate as a Women's Mental Health Specialist.
C R E D E N T I A L S & E X P E R I E N C E
W H A T I L O V E
Bergamot candles
Walks
Period piece TV or Movies
Scrabble
Travel
Spending time with my husband and two kids
Cats
Most Historical Fiction books and What My Bones Know by Stephanie Foo
Billie Eilish & The Cure
Watching ballet
Yoga
The right therapist can make
all the difference.
I fully support my clients in finding someone they feel truly comfortable with—even if that’s not me.
If we work together, I want you to feel at ease, even when sitting in the discomfort of growth.
You deserve a space where you can show up as your full self, without judgment—
because that’s where real transformation happens.
If this resonates with you, let’s connect.
Frequently Asked Questions
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I accept BCBS PPO. If you don’t have BCBS, my fee is $200 for 50 minute sessions. I am happy to provide you with a super bill that you can send to your insurance to get partial reimbursement at the percentage rate that is set by your particular plan. You can call your insurance provider to find this out-of-network provider reimbursement rate. Insurance requires a diagnosis for treatment.
Extended sessions are also offered for self-pay clients:
$285 for 90 minutes
$375 for 2 hours
If you are interested in an intensive day or two of therapy (4 or more hours over one or two days), we can discuss my fees based on your needs.
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Per the 2022 No Surprises Act, clients have the right to receive a Good Faith Estimate explaining how much healthcare services will cost if not utilizing health insurance to assist in payment. If applicable to you, once we are establishing services a Good Faith Estimate with be emailed to you outlining the estimated cost of therapy weekly, biweekly, monthly and so on for your informed consent.
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Yes! I offer a free 15 minute consultation to see if we are a good fit. Click the contact me button and reach out today to get scheduled
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I offer day time sessions Monday-Thursday. I try to be flexible within that time-frame as I know we are all busy!
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We can meet weekly, bi-weekly or once a month. The frequency is up to you and your needs.
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Fill out this contact form and I will email you to get our first session scheduled.
“Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know.”
— Pema Chodron
